Stay-at-home Mom vs. Working Mom

Through the years I've walked many paths of motherhood.

I've been the young mother, scared and alone. I've been the single parent trying to raise healthy, happy children. I've been the mother who had to work two jobs to make ends meet. I've been the mother who worked those jobs and went to school at the same time. I've been the mother who met an amazing man, fell in love and got married. I've been the mother, who after years of struggling, finally got to stay at home and watch my children grow.

It's been quite a journey!

With that said, I'd like to voice my opinion on the whole stay-at-home mom vs. the working mom topic. I've done both, so I feel that I've earned the right to speak...

First of all, whether you're working or not, it's never easy to be a good mother.

Secondly, being a stay-at-home mother is work!!! That is, unless you never clean, cook, change diapers, break-up spats, do laundry, give baths, and all the other many duties that fall under the job description for this position.

Oh! I know... You might say that a "working" mother does all of this, PLUS works outside of the home. That's true, but to a different degree. For example, when I worked outside of the home, my children went to daycare. While they were there, someone else was changing diapers, feeding them, breaking-up their usual spats, and so on. It wasn't that I was working any less. Instead, it was an exchange of duties...

Also, when I was "working," there weren't any little ones at my house to make a mess. There weren't any dishes being used. At the end of the day, I returned home to find my house exactly as I had left it.

Now, please don't think that I'm bashing the working moms, because I'm not. They are working just as hard. They come home tired at the end of the day, but they don't get to just sit and relax. They are confined to a much stricter schedule most of the time. They often miss their children, or feel as if they are missing out on important aspects of their child's life. (I know their struggle).

In my opinion, it's all a matter of sacrifice.

If you stay at home, you may sacrifice adult contact and alone time. You don't always have the opportunity to talk to or see other adults. It's easy to become overwhelmed by the day-to-day responsibilities. You don't get paid, though you work all of the time. You have no hope of getting a promotion. I mean, who do you know who went from being "Mom" to being the president or chairman of the house? It just doesn't happen...

However, if you work outside of the home, you sacrifice spending more quality time with your children. It's easy to become stressed about the rigid schedule that you must follow. You get paid, but it's usually never enough to make you feel like it's worth it. You might miss your child's school play, because your boss demands that you be at work. That's harsh! You've had to experience it to understand...

So, in a nutshell, I highly respect both categories of motherhood. They are equally as difficult and demanding. As for the argument about which is harder, it's a matter for each individual to decide. Not everyone can handle the pressures of being a stay-at-home mom. Not everyone can handle the stresses of being a "working" mom. Everyone is different...

FYI: Here's a look at my stay-at-home schedule. I added this up for my own curiosity, but thought I'd share it with you. Keep in mind that I am somewhat of a perfectionist, so I clean a lot... You might find it interesting to take a closer look at your own schedule. You might be surprised...

~ 2 hours/day cleaning the house
~ 3 hours/day cooking, feeding, and such
~ 1 hour/day doing laundry (Doesn't include washing/drying time).
~ 2 hours/day diapering, bathing, changing babies
~ 21 hours/week on my classes and homework (Doesn't include my 45 min. drive one way)
~ 2 hours/day helping the girls with their homework

Total = 84 hours/week (Does not include grocery shopping, paying bills, doctor visits, extra-curricular activities, getting up at night with sick or scared children, attending family events, blogging, working online, etc.).